Give Up Good to Find Your Great in a Relationship

February 14, 2025

How much have you let complacency sneak into your life?

When I was asked this question by my mentor, it resonated deeply.

I’m always reaching higher, aiming for more, and thinking about how to make a bigger impact. But when we started talking about complacency, I couldn’t deny that I felt a new truth taking shape in my heart: I have more to give. And that “more” includes deeper emotional availability and intentionality in my closest relationships.

Sometimes, you find yourself in a comfortable groove. Everything is familiar and humming along, and life is pretty good for a while. But, despite everything being pretty good, you still get that nagging feeling that something isn’t quite right.

You might notice this in a lack of meaningful moments with your loved ones or a growing emotional disconnection. There’s this thing inside you that keeps reminding you that you have more to give.

That’s a tell-tale sign of complacency.

You might be missing out on your great by settling for your good.

Giving Up Good For Great

What does it mean to give up your good to find your great?

Imagine you find yourself at a point in life when everything is going pretty well. Your days are full. Your bills are paid. Your loved ones are healthy. It seems like a lot to be grateful for, right? Why would you ask for more?

On the other hand, your days are ruled by a draining routine. Plus, your relationships feel functional but not transformational, and you long for a more intentional connection.

Some people would call that a good life. It’s good. It’s comfortable. It requires very little risk.

But I believe that where we start is not where we should stay. “Good enough” should never be the ceiling for your connections. At some point, we need to give up good to reach for great again.

Now, how do you do that? How do you start this personal transformation journey?

How To Gracefully Shift from Good to Great

Building upon your good to reach your great seems easier than doing it. But I’ve found that approaching it with trust and a solid plan can be pretty seamless and energizing!

1. Acknowledge the Good

Before you can start to look ahead, you first want to acknowledge the good life you’ve been living. Thank your loved one for their support. Write down your gratitude for the job that’s allowed you to build and create so much.

Say a prayer of thanks for the body, mind, and talents that got you to this moment. Spend a minute acknowledging the lessons that brought you to this point of self-discovery.

2. Ask for Your Great to be Revealed

Every transition should start with this simple (sometimes not-so-simple) task. You have to ask for your great to be revealed to you!

I’m very spiritual, and I like to spend time talking to God. I’ll talk about what I’m searching for, and then simply ask for it. If I don’t know what I’m searching for, I’ll ask for it to be revealed to me.

This applies equally to relationships. Ask yourself or pray for guidance to create the openness to experience deeper bonds.

3. Meditate and Record

You might be waiting for your greatness to be revealed at this point, but that doesn’t mean you can just sit back and wait for a miracle. It’s your job to work toward greatness, even when you don’t know where to start.
When that’s the case, combining meditation and journaling can be very helpful. Reflect on what emotional depth and transformation look like within your connections. Victory lies in the small, intentional shifts.

4. Write Out Your Plan

As more and more pieces fall into place, I begin pulling all these ideas together to form a plan. If you want to pivot from good to great, what does that look like?

What must you do to honor your good – and everything it’s taught you? Don’t just turn your back on the foundation you’ve laid. Instead, build upon it. Then, start dreaming up what great would look like.

Write down practical, actionable steps, and outline how you’ll set aside time or energy for this evolution.

5. Shift Your Time and Resources

At this point, it’s time to start putting your plan into action. Schedule calls, allocate attention toward your goals, and prioritize intentionality in the relationships that matter most. By making small changes, start showing up in ways that reflect your pursuit of greater connection.

6. Seek Help and Support

I’ve mentioned this already, but it’s so important that it’s worth repeating. No one can change the world, move mountains, and become their best self on their own. It takes a community of support.

You’ll need your circle of trusted friends, mentors, and power partners now more than ever. You might even need personal growth coaching. Each part of the community can help you make connections, hold you accountable, and more.

What’s Next?

As I pivot from good to great, I don’t want you to think I’ve got this all figured out. I’m still working through life and seeing where it takes me.

I haven’t quite figured out what my great will look like once I’ve arrived there. That’s the beauty of self-discovery—it unfolds as you go.

The Bottomline

When I noticed I was settling for “good enough,” I allowed myself to dream of what’s possible. That leap has reawakened my sense of connection—not just with others, but with myself. I’m learning to love the art of self-discovery.

If you feel that same nudge—when “good” isn’t quite cutting it anymore—embrace the challenge. The unspoken greatness within your connections is worth reaching for.

Don’t just hold on. Thrive. And ask yourself this: What will you settle for?