Finding The Courage To Be Disliked By Others

Finding the courage to be disliked doesn’t mean disregarding others feelings. It just means caring more about what’s right for you.

 

Finding the courage to be disliked, if you ask me, is more often about finding the courage to be authentic

Often it starts with a disruption – a reason to change the way you approach things – in order to make a real shift in your life.  

Sometimes we start to make these changes that are good for us, that put us on the path to the life we truly desire. We become more and more unapologetically ourselves

But as we level up in our own lives, other people start to pull away. 

This is when it takes courage to move forward. To be the voice of dissension in a room full of people who think one way. To make an unpopular choice. To express the need for a new boundary. 

Holding space for yourself inside of those experiences can be very difficult, but it’s even more rewarding

When we declare what we believe and create boundaries around our values, we are instigating the kind of change that makes anything possible. But it will inevitably create some tension in relationships. 

That’s why true transformation requires the courage to be disliked from time to time. How do you do that? 

Turn to your internal resources. 

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Finding The Courage To Be Disliked: Why It’s Worth It

Sometimes being authentically you can be a little uncomfortable at first, and even feel a bit isolating. But I’m not saying it’s easy – I’m just saying it was worth it.

1. Allows For True Authenticity 

The courage to be disliked is, in essence, the courage to be authentically, unapologetically you. It’s strengthening your voice as you learn to say no to group think and establish your own thoughts and feelings around … pretty much everything. As soon as you let go of what other people are thinking about you, you finally have the freedom to finally just be you

2. Builds Strength & Resilience 

the courage to be disliked, the courage to be disliked by others, finding the courage to be disliked, the courage to be authentic, the courage to be disliked summary, courage, authenticity, authentically you, self development, melissa hullAccepting that you might not be liked by everyone all the time naturally builds strength and resilience. It’s a sign of emotional strength and acuity because you can begin to explore your feelings and beliefs and dreams for the future – and not be talked out of them. It gives you the ability to continue on whether or not people are supporting you. That’s a kind of strength and resilience that can accomplish anything in life. 

3. Encourages Compassion For Others

When you no longer worry about making sure everyone likes you, it becomes surprisingly easy to show them more compassion. You can respond to their words or behaviors without reacting from an emotional or triggered space. Instead, you can just see the other person for who they are and accept them. Plus, when we hold fast and true to our own beliefs, we’re more willing to act with kindness and empathy when we do see an injustice. 

4. Improves Boundary Setting 

It’s so much easier to set healthy boundaries when you decide that your opinion of yourself is more important than someone else’s opinion of you. Suddenly you can see when a boundary is necessary, and you feel a strong enough conviction to enforce it. You start to see things differently as you realize more boundary-crossing behavior would just damage the relationship anyway, so it’s better for everyone if you communicate it now, with compassion and respect. 

5. Eliminates The Need For Outside Validation 

Most importantly, the courage to be disliked will eliminate the need for outside validation. And that is life-changing. 

You see, when you’re not worried about being disliked, it strengthens your ability to listen to others with openness and kindness. You can listen to what they have to say and be curious about it, without taking it and making it your own. You can be truly focused on them, instead of how they make you feel. 

After all, part of our purpose in this life is to be exposed to lots of different people and ideas and experiences, so you can decide what’s right for you. Then, when you’ve discovered the courage in your convictions – they’ll carry you through life with calm and compassion, even in the face of conflict. 

By trusting what’s within you, instead of looking outward for validation, you find a level of autonomy and freedom that becomes way more important than being liked.

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The Bottom Line

Finding the courage to be disliked does not mean allowing yourself to not care when you’ve been offensive or hurtful or rude. In fact, it’s just the opposite. It’s about knowing yourself and your beliefs so deeply that you are all you need. And that simple act of self-love is what opens you up to being more compassionate to others – even when they are the one being offensive or hurtful or rude. 

Yes, it might still sting. And it definitely takes practice and support. But finding the courage to be disliked, when you’re doing what’s best for you, is an incredible act of self-love. 

It’s giving yourself permission … to be yourself, to accept yourself, to prioritize yourself, and to allow that kind of love to pour outward into others. 

So give yourself permission. Because if you wait for someone else to do it, you’ll be waiting forever. 

And that’s just the truth. 

Need More Support?

If you’re looking for more support as you take the leap and risk being disliked, please reach out to me or join my community

I also recommend taking a look at my #1 key to confidence, or these three reasons to stop taking things personally

Just remember, you’re never alone on this journey. And all you have to do is take the next right action.

Ready To Take Action?

I’ve been working on this practice for over 20 years, and I’ve learned quite a few tools, techniques and mindsets along the way. 

I share all my best strategies for navigating life’s toughest moments inside of my membership community. You can even find a video course on this exact topic that includes everything you need for self-discovery and empowered action. 

All you have to do is show up for the journey